Tag Archive for Communication skills
Another tip from Misunderstood!: The Fast Guide to Communicating at Work–What to Say, How to Say It and When to Shut Up (Volume 1)
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Mistake: Making assumptions. Do you frequently finish other people’s sentences? Are you guilty of using the phrase, “I know that already” before you have heard a complete sentence?
The message you send is, “I know more than you do, so let me help you out.” This is not only rude behavior, but it will brand you as a “know-it-all.”
Instead, listen patiently, ask clarifying questions, and paraphrase the speaker’s words. Seek to understand the speaker and their message before making suppositions. This positive behavior will brand you as an excellent communicator.
Copyright 2010 Allie Casey. Excerpt from my soon to be available book Misunderstood! the Fast Guide to Communicating at Work-What to Say, How to Say It and When to Shut Up. If you haven’t received your FREE 6-part audio series – The Power of Effective Communication” then get it now. Just enter your name and email in the boxes on the upper right for instant access.
LISTENING WHEN THE STAKES ARE HIGH AND EMOTIONS ARE RUNNING DEEP
One if the most difficult listening skills to master is the ability to allow another to vent completely before you offer advice, coaching, solutions or comfort.
It takes fortitude to listen to complaints and grievances.
The last thing most people want to do is ask a distraught or upset person if there is anything more they want to say….BUT , you must!
Yikes! Who wants to hear more whining, groaning, complaining or tales of woe. As painful as it sounds, you must take the time to ensure the emotional storm has passed.
Jumping in to speak (even if there has been a long pause), before the last bit of sticky trash has come unstuck from the bottom of the barrel ensures you won’t be heard. It’s akin to pouring clean water atop a thin layer of mud and expecting it to remain clean and pristine. Not going to happen.
So you must ask, “Is there anything more?” And if there is, you must listen and then ask again. Not until the answer is a resounding (even if whispered), “no–that’s it” can you offer your thoughts.
Try it. It works.
Misunderstood! The Fast Guide to Communicating at Work–What to Say, How to Say It and When to Shut Up is now available at Amazon. Pick up a copy and get your bonuses–today! In the meantime, get your FREE 6-part audio series, The Power of Effective Communication simply by entering your name and email in the box to your right.
It’s difficult to keep your cool in an emotionally-charged conversation without saying something you’ll regret.
Consider the long term impact of your words. What result will occur moments after your conversation? Will the results last more than a few moments? What about in a year from now? You’ll discover that some conversations didn’t need to happen at all–but don’t make that an excuse for not having the ones that do.
Thinking about the long term consequences allows you to put things into perspective. And, perspective goes a long way towards guiding the tone, words, and intention of your communication.
Copyright 2010 Allie Casey
Excerpt from the forthcoming book —Misunderstood! The Fast Guide to Communicating at Work–What to Say, How to Say it and When to Shut-up
When giving negative feedback keep in mind the type of feedback you are providing:
* Is it to find a solution to a disagreement?
* Is it directions or information to shift a project that is going off course?
* Is it to express dissatisfaction concerning work, behavior, or productivity?
Asking these questions and making the distinction helps you keep focused on the response and behavior you are seeking. It’s easy to get distracted or go off course especially when your listener starts defending his position.
Try it. Leave your comments.
*This tip comes from my forthcoming book, “Misunderstood! The Fast Guide to Communicating at Work–What to Say, How to Say it and When to Shut-Up! Watch for it.